Posted on Oct 3, 2016 in Blog |
This past weekend, I was planning to take a girlfriend to our cabin for a weekend of wildness: you know, going braless, reading, writing, and doing needlepoint. I figured if we really got restless, we could roast marshmallows in the fire pit and take the dogs for a long stroll. Friday morning, my car was completely packed, ready to go.
Except, my ear had kept me up the previous two nights with pain. I was on antibiotics for an ear infection. My LLMD saw it on Wednesday, prescribed the meds, told me if I didn’t feel better Thursday, to call in for another scrip, which I did.
At 5 am Friday, I was in tears. Then, my eardrum ruptured, which usually actually feels better because the pressure is released. I felt better for about two hours and then the pain returned.
I was determined to get away from the weekend. So I went to a local “doc in a box”. He took a look, even gave me a photo of the inside of my ear. He suggested we clean it out first, which he emphasized would be painful. I suggested we not. I wanted to get on the road. I had enough ear infections as a child to know what that pain would be and I wanted none of it. Can you tell I was still in a bit of denial about the severity of this issue?
The doc let me go, told me to return on Monday, and he gave me a prescription for OXYCODONE. Hmmm . . . that’s when a little red flag went up that maybe I was in for a bit more pain than I anticipated.
Jeff, looking incredulously at me, asked, “And what happens when you hit 3000 feet on the mountain on the way to the cabin?” Hmm . . . I hadn’t thought about that.
I texted the photo of my eardrum to my LLMD, who then responded, “I’ve texted Dr. W. Call his office and they will see you now.” Dr. W is our favorite ENT physician. He added, “Abundance of caution is indicated presently,” another red flag.
A little voice inside said, “Have Jeff take you b/c you are not going to like this procedure.” Jeff drove, and then, in the doctor’s office, as I sobbed, he held me and comforted me while all the nasty stuff was removed. Evidently, it was a nasty infection filled with bacteria and fungus with lot of swelling.

That’s the inside of my ear – ewwwwww.
The doc filled my ear canal with an anti-fungal steroidal cream and I return this week for a progress check.
On the way home, Jeff asked me if I stll planned to go to the cabin. Actually, he said, “You can’t possibly be thinking of still going to the cabin . . . “

Sharon’s MAD FACE/
I came home and slept three hours, exhausted from the pain and angst.
No, I didn’t go to the cabin. I stayed home, slept, rested, and got a few things done around the house.
HOW DOES THIS RELATE TO CHRONIC ILLNESS?
1. Pain – when I am in pain, I am focused on the pain. I don’t clearly hear what others around me are saying. I brought Jeff with me to help me get through a rough appointment. The doctor gave important instructions, none of which I heard while we were in there. I’m grateful I had Jeff in there to be my ears, eyes, and brain. Take someone to your monthly LLMD appointment. It’s such a physically and emotional exhausting appointment, you need someone else to clearly hear what is said.
2. Listen to your gut – When a little voice inside is telling you something, you probably need to listen. There is no way I could have driven myself home from that procedure at the ENT.
3. Humor – I still believe humor is key in diffusing the emotional intensity of a situation, and to help add a bit of perspective to the situation. When I was so wrapped around the axel with pain, Jeff helped me chuckle and let go of the pain just until it was manageable again.
4. REST – Rest is key to healing, whether it’s an acute or chronic infection. If I don’t rest, I won’t heal.
5. Expectations – Yet, another time, I have had to cancel my plans due to my illness. With the car packed, I thought I could still “manage” the issue. I think I was more upset with the fact that I had to cancel a trip I had long been looking forward to rather than being disappointed about being sick (again).
6. Acceptance – Acceptance is so key in the healing process. Once I accepted I was sick and what I needed to do to heal, the healing could actually begin. I slept in late, letting my body do whatever it needed to do to heal. I didn’t go out and about, running errands. I just stayed home and healed, doing little things like the laundry, and cleaning out my needlepoint stash.
There is something to learn from every experience. When I am trying to squash that little voice of reason in my head, or the loud voice of reason beside me (Jeffrey), I probably need to re-evaluate my goals.
I didn’t get away this weekend. But I also did not cause further harm to my body. I rested. I got a few house chores completed that would have been waiting for me upon my return. I didn’t cause my hubby too much extra concern or worry. If I had gone to the cabin, he would have been basket-case with worry. And my ear infection is healing. And, really, healing is the most important thing we can do. If we aren’t healing, we aren’t moving forward.
Recent Comments