Posted on Dec 11, 2015 in Blog |

It’s the holidays –  I’m just recovering from my second surgical procedure in two weeks. I’m sore and tired. My back hurts from sitting in an uncomfortable chair.
I have purchased maybe 6 gifts and only 4 are for my own family.
I am VERY behind in shopping and VERY behind in work tasks.

I came home from my first day at work this week and was exhausted from just four hours of work.  I spent the rest of today on FB just letting my brain waste away.

Sounds like I have a chronic illness, doesn’t it?

So, I am saying to you, IT’S OK.
It’s ok not to finish everything.
It’s ok to put up 1/3 of the decorations.
It’s ok to go to bed early.
It’s ok to eat light dinners.

This also tends to be the time of year when we re-evaluate what has transpired in the past twelve months.
For many of us in treatment, it’s usually followed with a heavy sigh, disappointment, frustration, and sadness.
I got some not so great news a month or so ago (more on that later).  I was pissed off.  Sad. Mad. Defiant. Defeated.
A year ago, I thought my next phase would take six months and i would be DONE. I was wrong.
I am hoping to finish up this treatment protocol by the end of December.
And, in January, I have to start a new protocol for another co-infection.
I’m pissed.  Really pissed.  and really sad. But we didn’t know a year ago what we know now.
I’ve killed Bartonella (bacterial infection) and I’ve killed Protomyxoa Rheumatica FL 1953 (parasitic infection).  And I’m going to annihilate this third one.

So, you are tired. I’m tired. But we are going to keep going. We will not stop.
We will continue to fight.
But for this week, just go a little easy on yourself.
Love yourself more.
Drink more water.
Sleep  more.
Stretch more.
And reach out to someone else who understands this disease.  It will help you both.

Don’t give up before the miracle happens.  I have seen numerous miracles in my recovery and I believe there are more to come.  So hang in there with me, ok?