Posted on Aug 15, 2015 in Blog |

Flow. I bet some of you thought this might be about yoga. Wrong. When I hear about a close friend experiencing a medical crisis, I go into full forward motion. I do anything and everything I can to motivate and coordinate people into helping the person in need. I may not be able to do everything, but I can find people who can fill in the blanks. The difficulty I have in this is that I tend to bring that anxious energy and fear into my own body and I store it there. I don’t let it just FLOW through me as I learned in Somatic Experiencing therapy. I think I need a refresher course. When I go to the doctor’s office for a test, I get tense. My muscles are tight and I don’t even realize it. I try to make small talk with the emotionless tech but by the end, I’m still tense and anxious upon leaving. When I get a massage, I can sometimes get emotional. It’s like a total cleansing. Getting all the bad juju out in an hour. When I get acupuncture, I usually feel invigorated and relaxed. I feel enlightened, actually and I can usually come home and write rather easily and freely. Today, I did all of the above. And I am completely exhausted. I sucked in all the negative energy with my friend Bambi’s stroke updates. I didn’t let the energy FLOW through. I caught, but didn’t release. I tried deep breathing at the doctor’s office, but I’m still emotionally and physically processing what is happening. This was totally unexpected and I feel like I’ve been thrown off kilter. It takes me awhile to get my balance back. The massage was fantastic, first time with this person, first massage by a man (yes it was weird, but he is amazing) and he got into my muscles and fascia really deeply. My physical therapist has to use a steel tool to break my fascia apart from my muscles. And as I got more relaxed, I could feel my emotions from the week starting to surface. But I was ok so far. And...

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