Posted on Jan 1, 2015 in Blog |

Jeff’s father, James Rainey, died on New Year’s Eve, 2014.  I wrote this poem four hours later, recounting all the things I said to him in his final few days and hours.  I didn’t want to forget. I love you. You created two beautiful children who learned your kindness and generosity. You did a good job of raising them. You should be proud. Thank you for giving me the most wonderful husband I could have dreamed of. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. In 25 years, you never said an unkind or unsupportive word. You never spoke to me in anger. It’s ok to let God take over now. Do whatever you need to do to get up there. Come to me in my dreams and show me what heaven looks like. I want a preview! You are so loved by so many people. When you get to heaven you will no longer be limited in your hearing, sight, speech, or mobility. Your soul will be free of all limitations. And you will be in paradise. The blue in your eyes is fading which tells me you are preparing to leave. It’s ok to leave. But I am so going to miss your aqua gaze. A friend of mine sang songs to his brother as he lay dying. I would try that but I am afraid it may hasten your departure. And I don’t know what songs I would sing. I know you loved opera. But that just isn’t going to happen. Should I read to you from a book?  I’m not sure what you want to hear right now. I don’t want to sound like an audio recording. Thank you for reading my book over and over and over. And complimenting me every time you read it. I think next to Jeff, you are my biggest fan. You are so loved. I want to curl up here in bed and lie next to you. I want to never leave your side until you leave us. I want to keep caressing your arm, running my fingers through your snowy hair, holding your hand and telling you I love you....

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