Posted on Feb 3, 2013 in Blog |

Riley Rainey, February 3, 2013

Earlier today, our beloved Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Riley escaped from the invisible fence again and was hit by a car and killed. The driver did not stop. Fortunately, a Neighbor (Cindy Elkin) stopped, wrapped Riley in a towel and brought him into her garage and called us. Thank you, Cindy, for not letting me find my sweet babydoll in the road.

For now, I am trying to focus on breathing. It’s all I can do right no

Just hours ago, we were snuggled in bed, him on his back enjoying his tummy rub. He licked my nose in appreciation and adoration. Like he did every day, every opportunity.

Riley told me how much he loved me with his eyes and his tongue every single chance he could. Every morning, every night, every meal, every chance he got.

Riley brought me sheer, unadulterated, magical joy; unrelenting, unconditional love. He loved me with a full heart 24/7. That was his job here on earth. And I guess his job was complete in these past short ten months. I loved Riley like I have loved no other animal. He was my heart.

I took him errand running with me yesterday. We spent two hours in the car together (getting the voltage turned up on his invisible fence collar and a tighter collar, going to pet smart for treats and a new harness, going to the office, getting Stephen’s birthday presents ready – yes, Stephen’s birthday is today).

A little bit of me has questioned God about being punished for something to have Riley taken from me now. I can’t go there right now. And really, I don’t believe God punishes us this way. But when my heart aches extra, that questions comes up.

For now, I want to focus on Riley. He gave me utter joy. There is no other way to describe his affection for me, and mine for him.

In just the hours since it has happened and I posted it on Facebook, we have received hundreds, literally hundreds of messages, texts, emails, phonecalls, and even a few visitors to the house. We are blessed and graced by the love and compassion shared with us today in our grief.

Thank you everyone for your words, public and private. I can’t press Like for them all; it just hurts too much right now. But I am reading all of them. I am receiving all of them.

Thank you to Pamela Creamer for the amazing picture that I will always have of Riley. She captured his spirit and spunk and I will always be grateful for that.

Please pray for the person who hit Riley. If it is someone who cannot muster the strength to ‘own up’ to it, pray that they may ask God for forgiveness and feel that forgiveness given. If it is someone who doesn’t ‘care,’ pray that God gives them what HE wants for them in their lives. It is not my place to judge. Love conquers all.

Please pray for Stephen that his next birthday will be much better; that he won’t have to dig a grave on his birthday as he did today. Pray that we can rejoice in his birth and celebrate his life as he has been one of God’s greatest gifts to us these past 20 years.

I mourn for Riley, but I must do so without the expense of endangering my health progress. And by the connections I have made today, I know this event is part of a bigger plan for me with greater opportunities. Ten days ago, I was told I needed to expose another layer to get to another level of healing . . . I really thought I was ‘done.’ The past ten days brought a series of innumerable incidents that have proven to me that I am not done. Until today, those incidents were filled with positive energy.

So I am earnestly listening to God, awaiting His instructions.

I am exhausted now. Going to bed, hoping that Riley will come to me in my dreams.

Some comments that have made me gulp extra hard . . .

I am holding her close and crying on her. She knows something bad has happened. Sweet Riley was put on this Earth with a purpose and he must have completed that purpose. Thank God for the rainbow bridge. He will be waiting. – Kelly has a Cavalier King Charles named Zoe.

Rest in peace sweet angel … I had fallen in love with you and love all the stories your mom shared with us.

Heaven got a little brighter today.

My heart is breaking for all of you. I am crying and grieving with you. I know how much you loved Riley and how important his love and devotion to you has been. I loved him too, for I knew the comfort he provided to you. I wish I was there just to sit with you.

i cannot even find the words. i know riley is your heart

We know you and Riley are connected at the heart. Today, breathe in and out and please be gentle to yourself in every way.

Riley has been such a magical part of your family.